Marriage Guidance

If there were an organisation like Relate for poker players, I'd be booking me and the game a session now; We seem to be in a routine, the spark has most definitely gone and I am approaching it with a painfully pesimistic half-heartedness.

Put simply, I am playing like a middle-aged woman.

I had the (mis-)fortune to be dealt AK suited 1st hand and when my half pot bet into a paired board of Jacks and semi-connectors was massively re-raised on the river, I kinda had to fold. But having seen him play after, hindsight suggests I may just have been ahead.

I saw no pocket pairs all night (well the 2 hours I lasted for), not even sure I hit a flop - and, in fairness, only one hand I had would have won at showdown (5-9 diamonds which I folded pre flop but flushed on the river).

I gambled with value from blinds or late position with pretty marginal jacks and queens but got nowhere and, with a huge stack to my left and another live one a couple of seats further down, I couldn't really get busy, certainly not when the picture cards totally dried up.

The blinds seemed disproportionately painful for the early hour and I hit the break only marginally above half my starting stack, not having been given shove-able cards in the buy-back period.

I resolved a change of chip protector, letting my ponytail down and switching from water to my habitual chardonnay was in order. I had to try something. But one double up and the tournament would have a significantly different complexion.

Upon our return, I folded A-6 and A-5 off, multi-handed or against a raise of half my stack from early position. Yes, probably wus-y girlie folds where the pros would have been all-in in a heartbeat, but I just didn't feel it. Maybe this is part of the problem?

Then, not long after, again following a raise of 1100 under the gun with blinds still only 200-400, I saw KQ spades. Fully expecting (and hoping for) a call, I shove. I am up against K-J off. I should have been delighted but my heart sank. Never under-estimate women's intuition. We are very infrequently wrong.
I have my now traditional plea with the dealer to 'be nice', cos I feel like I should use all my remaining 'armour'.

Blanks on the flop; Rainbow. No spades, of course.
Jack, of course, on the turn.
Blank 2 on the river.

A polite 'good game' from my left, a sheepish look from the man with the Jack. A handshake and a 'good luck, everyone' from me.

What is a middle-aged woman to do? Not go play cash, that's for sure.

Comeback

After a good few weeks' absence, I am returning to the live tables tonight at LPC, with an online SNG cash and bubble to my name from Tuesday night of this week when there really genuinely wasn't anything better for me to do.

Can't say yet that I'm excited about it, sadly, but kinda needs to be done, otherwise I may lose my mojo indefinitely. Just craving a half decent run of cards to give me something to get creative with; I have my 'power' bra on, my hair was painstakingly straightened this morning (not that the cards will care about that, of course) and I have resolved to come out fighting as much as possible and see where we get to.

Everything crossed...

Getting Better

Lovely evening with the 888 chaps, Shane Warne and invited VIPs, guests and media last night and I think it's fair to say poker and I are falling back in love again.
Gorgeous place The Red Room, part of Les Ambassadeurs club, Hyde Park Corner; elegant furnishings, lots of space, friendly people, not up its own ar$e at all as I totally expected it to be. The nice man in all black who was stood near the bar when I arrived - I guess he was some kind of host, although I thought he was security for a bit - came straight over and offered to give me a guided tour of the club; it was like a stately home indoors and a luxurious, holiday, adult playground outside - it was just missing a huge hot tub as far as I could see. The beautiful, exotic slender women in their sexy but classy after-dark-air-hostess-like attire brought round endless trays with tons of mini cheeseburgers, kebabs, prawns, scallops and other nibbles on. Schoolgirl error to have eaten just before coming out.

Roland de Wolfe strode in at about 8.15pm. As you do. He went over and patted Warne on the back and manly hand-shaking and banter ensued briefly, before he disappeared again like a genie ducking back into his lamp.

I think the majority of the players will admit the poker was, for the most part, loose and aggressive; one of the pros, 'fresh' from Vegas went out pretty early, closely followed by Warne who got them in way ahead but was sucked out. Then somehow 2 went together in a huge 3-way all in not long after.

There looked to be only realistically 1, maybe 2 winners, one of which was the big boss of 888 Poker, who I guess couldn't really win the 5k prize; well, I figure he wouldn't really call all ins for half his stack with 3-4 normally...
The whole tourny was over in around 2 hours, won by one of the 888 VIPs who isnt even playing that much at the moment and didn't go to WSOP because he couldn't be bothered(!) After the interviews, last photos etc, most people (the core drinkers/organisers) stayed around for a couple of hours more - there was only around 10 of us left by 11pm, hoovering up the last of the bar tab, but it was great, if a touch surreal, to just sit there, all in a circle, some pros, some journos, some marketeers, and just talk poker, life (and a bit of nonsense), but certainly like we'd known each other longer than 4 hours.

After a unanimous show of hands to gague interest in the group, we tried in vain to allow them to give us a set of cards, chips and the run of the vacated felt for a turbo SNG, but alas it was only added to the marketing notebook as an idea for 'next time'.

Still, good to see cards in the air and feel the excitement, even if only stood 2 metres away and without influence or consequence. Going to find an appropriate time and place to get back into it. I knew I wouldn't be able to stay mad at the game for long.

Medicine

I have never woken up with such excitement and bounded out of bed on a work day (with a slightly fuzzy head) as I did this morning.

My favourite placed candidate and industry sister, currently in Vegas with 888, had sent me an email overnight, which I read on blackberry, kindly inviting me to an exclusive soirée watching Shane Warne play in a cash game at Les Ambassadeurs club in Mayfair.

I can feel some curled hair, possibly even fake lashes, The Vegas Dress and orange heels coming on and, with any luck, this little experience will rid me of my current misgivings and frustrations about all things cards and chips and we can all be friends again soon.

Me and Poker are 'on a break'

Ok, really bored, now I am at my aggressive best, of numpties making ridiculous calls and sucking me out on the river. I know it happens. I know I have BEEN that ridiculous numpty on occasion in the past, but this is beyond a joke now, it's happening EVERY time.
Good job this is not the WSOP main event and is just 24-seat SNGs in my nightie. But I am now starting to realise why Phil Helmuth is such a foul-mouthed little so n' so. If I'm not careful, I am going to become one of those sad cases that goes around telling everyone online poker is fixed. After the last few days, I am starting to half believe it. (Excuse me a moment while I go and wash my mouth out with soap and water).

I have resolved that I am going to take a break for a bit. I would like to stress that while poker and I are currently separated, we continue to work on our differences, in the best interests of my bank account. There no other card games involved and we would appreciate it if the media would respect our privacy at this difficult time.

I think possibly I will focus more on offline poker in the next couple of weeks - or play bigger stakes on PokerStars for a bit; technically that's the site where I've had the most monetary success per tournament (albeit mostly playing against other women). If only there wasn't so many tournaments to choose from, it's a bloody minefield that lobby - to the untrained eye, at least. Anyway, EPT qualifiers will hopefully start in the next month or so, so I will have an objective and some focus again.

Stuck in a rut

Had a very uppidy-downy few days of casual online sit n go's; been playing (I think) some really decent, intuitive and aggressive and brave stuff, but can't seem to buy a break to get into the money. I know it goes like this sometimes but am just not sure what to do to get out of it and get my mojo back. The only thing inspiring me at the moment is Poker Heroine number 2 Jennifer Tilly and her win at the Bellagio Cup in Las Vegas. Go on girl.
I am thinking possibly of some serious (hopefully) 2-day live action at LPC over the weekend; huge starting stack, teeny tiny blinds eeking up very slowly and a chance to play some proper poker. Never played in anything like that before, so would be an experience, for sure - will have to have a read up in advance though of strategies for such tournaments (other than banning red wine and having plenty of coffee and Starfruit-OpalBursts)
Ultimately, though, will depend what the weather's like and whether my sister and her husband, aka new Mummy and Daddy and their simply gorgeous daughter Penny want company. Otherwise the shades and strappy top will be on and I will be off to Buckinghamshire to coo like a trooper.

Decisions, decisions

Ooooh now then.
I-Gaming Social tonight at fancy pants Amika club in High Street Kensington. That will be no more than a stone's throw from the LPC. Iiiinterrressssting.
I can feel some cash action coming on; I wonder whether there are other attendees who are members? (other than Sarah, my unsuspecting colleague, whom I signed up on her behalf last week, by way of 'encouragement'). Not sure I have the energy to go drinking, then get the cab to Edgware Road and stay awake in the Vic for the necessary amount of time to make it financially worthwhile - and still get home, sleep, shower, straighten hair and be back at my desk, bacon sandwich on brown in hand, for 8.30am tomorrow.
No doubt the chardonnay and the company I am keeping will, between them, make those decisions for me later...

If the Gods aint smilin'...

Am still undecided about whether to be disappointed tonight.

I managed to make a loose call first hand, from the small blind, on the flop and had to get rid on the turn. This served my reputation well though, 2nd hand in, when I was given kings and somehow managed to check-call the flop and turn and re-raise all in (with a call) on the river to double up very early doors, with the guy showing A-high on a paired board with a bunch of other blank looking under cards.

I got a tad playful with my riches and lost 1500 or so over the next hour, before I was moved away from my favourite LPC dealer Sean to table 2 from table 1. Always think it's bad karma being moved from what will be the final table and having to find your way back there again. I kinda had to call a quarter of my stack soon after arriving on table 2 when I was dealt 10s and up against an all-in from early position with a short stack. I was up against AJ. The dealer obeyed my demands of small cards all the way to the river and then plopped a jack out there. Not amused.

I wimped out of shoving with Q-10 suited later with a half decent raise and call already behind me. I chastised myself afterwards (having seen a queen high board appear), but was vindicated when I finally did borrow a pair if b******s later and had 2 of the big stacks fold to my all in (with K-J suited, from memory) pre flop, even them having raised and called before. I really thought about this move, rather than just cowering under the table, trying to protect my stack, like I normally do, convincing myself before a flop has been flipped that I am behind and/or will lose. I worked out what they had put in, what they would have to call, what kind of odds they would have, what they might have in the hole. I figured I might get rid of one of them but was rather chuffed when they both mucked and the nice writer chap to my left said 'Brave move', with more than a hint of taken-a-back-ness.

Then the same guy who had rivered his jack previously (with a few more chips now) shoved on a board of 6-K-J. I had been allowed to check my J-6 in the big blind, so, briefly double checking my cards, I snap called. I was up against AK. K tripped on the river. Behave, dealer! Really! He did apologise sheepishly while I was cursing my luck and anyone/anything that got in my eyeline. I suggested he should only say it if he really meant it.

So that decimated me. About 10-15mins later, I ended up seeing 3s with 2.5 bbs left. I all in called a raise from early position. The guy flipped aces (for the second time in 5 hands, I might add). Oh crap. Ace on flop. Bugger. Dealer then dug the knife in with a 3 on the river. Oh, do bore off...

I am seemingly getting less (but still some) polite support at the tables. Maybe it's cos these guys know my face and have seen me play some half decent stuff and realise I am bit more than a 'token bird'. I definitely prefer being treated like an equal - albeit one with decent eyelashes and rack...

I am concluding tonight is just one of those. Played good, did the right things (all but one time, maybe aruagably twice), but just no luck when I needed it. Still learning, still need to gamble and aggress more (it really works!), but the core is definitely, happily, here to stay.

Swiss Rolled

Just had a very jolly time in a little SNG on PKR. Felt good, alright cards, a couple of very handy kickers and some over the top over-the-tops from the also-ran men, and, all of a sudden, there were 6 and we had a final table of a nice Swiss guy from near Lausanne, a gobby Scouser, a bloke from Bracknell who had come from my table and 1 other, who obviously had somewhere better to be or simply no chips from the preceeding hour or so of the tournament - can't remember which.
Got into a big old pot with the Swiss chap who had tripped his 8 by the flop, when I was merrily getting worried that the Ace (which also completed a flush draw) on the river was the one that had ****ed my 2 pair - but called the value bet anyway....
The guy from Bracknell bled quietly to death while I reminisced (in French) in the chatbox with the Swiss about the delights of Geneva, Lausanne and quizzed him on Swiss gaming legislation. Jeezus, I need to get out more.
My french charm didnt do me any good though; Heads up didn't last long - he was 5:1 up on me by then, so when my ace high with a paired board ran into his trip 9s about 7 hands in, it was time for a bath. Nice to remind myself I can still do it (kinda), though.
My sister's baby is still having a whale (no pun intended) of a time inside her, so poker this weekend could still be (happily) interrupted - but, if not, I am hoping for a better run than last week. ANY run, actually, would be an improvement.
Time, as ever, will tell.